Hey, uh, this is Tim Schenectady, Pitchfork News, and you are now listening to
1 Trait Danger
(Stoney)
1 Trait Danger?
Who the fuck—
(Stoney Bologne)

Hey, Mike?
Mike, how did these guys get on the playlist?
(1 Trait)
Mike, get in here, this is live right now, what the hell is going on?
(1 Trait Danger)
(Alien Boy)
This is not part of the setlist
(1 Trait Danger)
Who picked this out?
(Cossett)

God dammit, somebody get Mike in here right now!
(1 Trait Danger!) (Bitcoin)
(1 Trait! Danger)
What the fuck? This was supposed to be Whitney, Mike!
(1)
Why the hell did this make it on the playlist?

(1 Trait Danger)
This is supposed to be Vampire Weekend!
This is supposed to be Perfume Genius, the good shit!
(Tim Schenectady, Pitchfork News) (Danger! Danger!)
What is this, Mike?

(Tim Schenectady) (1 Trait Danger)
Mike— somebody get Mike in here right now!
Somebody find Mike or we are fucked, we've been hacked!
(You are listening to 1 Trait Danger)
We've been fucking hacked again, God dammit!
Don't you people realize, this is going to ruin Pitchfork!
(Live, from Saturday night, it's New York)
This is going to ruin me!
Don't you guys get it? Where the fuck is Mike?

1 Trait, jammin' up your airwaves
1 Trait, fuckin' up your show
Bitchfork never knew what hit 'em
Hacked his shit with that hacker flow

1 Trait, baddies of the business
1 Trait, we're the best for show
1 Trait Danger is the name, bitch
1 Trait, this is how it go

Honey? Honey? Come upstairs, dinner's ready
Are you fucking kidding me, Mom?
Are you hacking again?
No, Mom, get out of my fuckin' room!
I told you I'd—I told you to stop hacking people!

Get the fuck out of my room!
Get upstairs and help your father!
Fuck you, Mom!
There's mustard everywhere!