Late one night in Tulsa, at a club called "Honey Buns"
A man pulled in the parking lot with his four-year-old son
He said, "I'm going in, I have some 'Daddy things' to do
So stay here in the car or else the monsters will eat you…"

So Daddy grabbed some singles and he went inside the door
The boy thought "I'll make Daddy proud, 'cause I'm a big boy of four"
And although the thought of monsters made him scared, he never cried
He just sat and watched as lots of other Daddies went inside

After half an hour he thought, "I gotta go real bad
But if I get pee-pee on Daddy's leather seats, he'll be real mad
I know that Daddy said that all the monsters would eat me
But I hope they'll let me go so I can make a winkie-wee"

He stepped out in the parking lot and ran for his young life
To the front door of the building with the flashing blinky lights
Once he got inside, the boy could not believe his eyes
There were lots of Mommies there of every shape and size

Mommies up on tables, and swinging 'round on poles
Most of them had lost their shirts; the boy hoped they weren't cold
He saw a cowboy Mommy wearing spurs and boots and chaps
And several Daddies had some Mommies sitting in their laps

"Can you help me?" he asked a Mommy in a Girl Scout costume
Eventually they found his Daddy in the champagne room
Daddy took a ride that night with two police-y men
And little Bob Kevoian never was the same again