This is going to be the best Christmas ever. - Everything this year's been a disaster - But I won't let it bother me at all - Nothing's going to bring me down, - It's Christmas and I'm pleased as punch - I'm going to stand my happy ground. - I refuse to let my family make me crazy - I'll smile at their insults and their frowns - I'll ignore the shitty weather - Cuz what counts is we're together - Loving, safe and sound - Nothing's going to ruin my holiday - Not this time, Ya hear?. (I won't let it happen) -
And If you try to ruin my holiday- - I swear you will regret it for the rest of the fucking year. - The turkey might have made the children vomit - The tree burned down and torched up all of our gifts - But I will grin and bear it - and this nightmare we will share it - Till I get my only wish- it's - Nothing's going to ruin my holiday - No act of God or family fight - Cuz if you try to ruin my holiday - I swear you will regret it for the rest of your fucking life - You'll burn in hell with hot pokers in your eyes and acid on your flesh -

This is going to be the best Christmas ever. - Soon this crappy Christmas will be over - And I'll go right back to my pissed-off self - But until that happens I'll just continue laughing - like one of those creepy, retard, mutant, North Pole Elves. - Nothing's going to ruin my holiday - Not this year I won't let that be the case - And If you try and ruin my holiday- - I'll punch you in your fat, disgusting, turkey eating face. - Understand me - This is going to be the best Christmas ever!