Intro:  G

  G              C            D                      G    C G
I thought it was you and your optimist's view of the clock
    G                G/F
And how it's always another day
E                           Am
Just after twelve o'clock's struck
    Am                    Am/G#                  D
You said "Now I only want you so I don't have to promise"
    Am               C
But tiny children in grown-up clothes

C/E                            D   D/C  D/B  D/A
Whispered all the Crimes of Paris


CHORUS
               G         C         D
You're not the girl next-door or a girl from France
       G         G/F         C/E        C/D
Or the cigarette-girl in the sizzle hot-pants
        C        G/B       D/A       G
All the words of love seem cruel and crass
            C              G/B       D/A      E  (possibly G)
When you're tough and transparent as armoured glass
       C          G/B        D/A      E
You're everywhere girl in an everyday mess
Am                          C    G  C G
Who'll pay for the Crimes of Paris


I heard that you fell for the "Hell or to Hammersmith Blues"
In the tiny torn up peices of his mind he's irresistible too
Now it's hard to say now if he's only stupid or smart
When he crawled through the door
And poured out more of his creeping-Jesus heart

Chorus

E            E7
And it's all here and now
    Am                Am/B         Am/C       A/E
She hit him with that paper-weight Eiffel Tower
Dm             G              Dm               G
And I tried to hold on to you but I don't know how
      C               C/B     C/A#       C/A
And I find it hard to swallow good advice
     Am         Am/B                Am/C        Am/D
Like going down three times to only come up twice
Am/D#        Am/E    G   C G
Come up twice

She's so convenient, he's always stiff as hair-laquer
It's hard to discover now he's in love with her
It was her way of getting her own back
You never did anything she couldn't do on her own
You're as good as your word and that's no good to her
You'd better leave that kitten alone

Chorus

Fade out:
(repeat last four bars of chorus)

Am  |  C  |  G  C  G  |  G  C   G...


E|----------------------------------------------------------------------|
Comments from Clyde MacFadden (mls377@nwu.edu):

The tough thing about Crimes of Paris (as in many EC songs) is that he's
actually only playing five chords on the guitar, but the changes in the
bass notes and the vocals are what you really hear.  So, if you play it by
yourself the way EC does on the album, it sounds like you're missing a lot
of important changes- and you are.  Luckily, it's not too tough to work the
bass notes into the chords on this one...I imagine that's how Elvis played
it as he was writing it, and if he ever performed it by himself.

Mark's chords were on the right track, but his choruses and a few other
parts were off.  There are a few frustrating things about playing this song
on guitar.  One is the pesky G with F  bass (there's no F major in the song)
in the verses, which is tough to play on guitar.  It sounds *okay* if you
play a G7 there- the F will be in the chord, just on top instead of on the
bottom.   A similar problem is the Am with G# bass- which can be solved by
flatting the A on the G string (what the hell chord is that anyway?
Ammaj7?????)  As for chords like C/E and G/B, well, the bass notes are in
the normal major chords anyway, but I included the bass notation for
fingerpicking purposes- or if any bass players want to give it a shot.

[...]

Whew!  I guess that's it.  Only Costello could make such a mess out of G,
C, D, Am, and E.  I mean that as a compliment.

If anyone thinks I messed up, feel free to add corrections.  And if anyone
thinks this is on target and wants other transcriptions, just ask.  I don't
have the time to do this every night, but if I have the time, I'll figure
any Costello song out.  I've even been trying to put together some guitar
arrangements for songs from "The Juliet Letters"  to play with my sister
(no way my voice can handle some of that stuff...).  It's easy to hear the
notes clearly with the Brodskys, but trying toactually play that stuff on
guitar is a different matter.  Even the occasional stuff that resembles
good ole Costello pop melodies ("Why must I always apologize...") is way
more complex than it sounds.

You know, I said I was going to study tonight...

-Clyde


(use Monaco font for proper chord alignment)

    G                G/F
And how it's always another day
E7                           Am
Just after twelve o'clock's struck
     Am                    Ami/G#                      D
You said "Now I only want you so I don't have to promise"


         G        G/F         C/E          C
Or the cigarette-girl in the sizzle hot-pants
         C        G/B       D/A        G/B
All the words of love seem cruel and crass
            C              G/B        D/A      G/B
When you're tough and transparent as armoured glass
       C          G/B        D/A       E/G#
You're everywhere girl in an everyday mess


E            E/D
And it's all here and now
    Am                Am/B         Am/C         A/E
She hit him with that paper-weight Eiffel Tower
Dm             G              Dm               G
And I tried to hold on to you but I don't know how
      C               C/B     C/Bb       A
And I find it hard to swallow good advice
     Am          Am/B                Am/C        ?/D   ?/D#
Like going down three times to only come up twice
A/E
Come up twice